Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Raising "REAL" Boys

Given I am pregnant (6 1/2 months now) with my 3rd boy, this headline immediately garnered my interest. And though I may generally agree that modern day America wants to neuter our boys/men...I have to take issue with the title of the piece:
RAISING A REAL MAN IN A METRO-SEXUAL WORLD

Is the general population unaware of what the term "metrosexual" means? It has NO sexual connotation and is not synonymous with Emo or Androgynous men. How can metrosexual be bad when David -OMG- Beckham is widely looked at as the metro poster boy?

Take The Man. He throws around 800 lb. boilers by day and cares what he looks (and smells like) by night. It's mainly about hygiene and appearance --and thank God for that. For years women were chastised for "letting themselves go" when in fact the men had never had themselves to begin with...

You can be "a man" and still have groomed hands and FEET boys (THERE IS NOTHING worse than hairy man feet with long, yellowing toenails). You can be "a man" and know that you shouldn't tuck a shirt with no belt if there are belt loops present. You can be "a man" and wear good cologne (and know that cologne does go bad, so you can't wear the Polo you bought in 1989 to every wedding you're invited to). You can be "a man" and know that if Jerry Seinfeld has it on --it's all wrong. You can be "a man" with the desire to stay attractive to your woman the same way you want her to stay attractive to you.

My man may not hunt or fish, but I challenge anyone to find something he can't fix. We have never had to hire someone to come to our house and rarely had to to fix our vehicles. My boys already pick things (like broken fans) from the trash and inform me they can fix them. Many would refer to MY Man as a metrosexual because he prefers expensive jeans, shoes and face creams...but they would be calling him that as they were hiring someone to install or fix their heating, air conditioning, plumbing, electrical, cars, lawn mowers, computers, or stereos...so who is more of "a man"?

...Other than that term being misused (when I wish more men would realize that a slovenly appearance does not denote manhood), it was an amusing article with quite a few poignant assertions. This was my favorite part:

*Teach them guidelines about crying
Our society has drilled in to our heads that it’s o.k. for men to cry at any time for any reason – the more the better. No, it’s not o.k. It is o.k. for men to cry once in awhile, but never in public. In general, you need to teach your boys to suck it up. This teaches them discipline and will power. It also teaches them to maintain composure during crisis or difficult times when they need all of their faculties to focus on solutions to problems. There are a few instances when it’s o.k. for a real man to cry:
o If your mother dies;
o If your sports team loses; or
o If you get home and find that your wife drank all of your beer or ate the submarine sandwich you were saving. (source)

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