Thursday, April 12, 2007

Street & Gore Say Philly Homicides A Product of Global Warming

Yesterday I found out that a relative of mine was one of the 108 homicides in Philadelphia this year. We haven't been able to find any information about his murder...I guess there have been too many to cover each one.

His name was Mark Knapp and he was a 45 year old father of two. He was my grandfather's nephew.

As I was searching (unsuccessfully) for any details of the crime, I came across an article that I thought was a spoof...

"...Rumor has it, however, that Mayor Street has conjured yet another reason for the carnage. He will announce at his next news conference, that he now knows the reason for Philadelphia's spiraling out of control homicide rates.

It is global warming.

Yes, citizens of Philadelphia, apparently, Mayor Street, consulted with his Democratic Party comrade, former Vice President Al Gore, and now realizes that because of Philadelphia's unique proximity to chemical plants (Allied Chemical), oil refineries ( Sunoco), and pharmaceutical companies ( Glaxo SmithKline), the burning of fossil fuels from these sources, as well as the port of Philadelphia's role for the importation of paper products, which as we all know causes the clearing of forests, Philadelphia dramatically increases the amount of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere and the temperatures of Philadelphia are rising.

Former Veep Al Gore is also expected to be at this conference to explain the details. He will be showing his movie about global warming, "An Inconvenient Truth," and link Philly's homicides with the melting of the Arctic glaciers..." (Read the entire article)

It's pretty bad when people are getting shot in the back and Anti-Violence rallies here, but somehow I think poor upbringing and a sense of entitlement has more to do with it than melting icecaps.

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