Thursday, July 28, 2005

In the Sandbox...

Showertime characters
I have witnessed some unusual and sometimes disturbing behavior in the communal shower trailers at Camp Victory, Iraq. It seems some people don’t understand what is considered reasonable behavior in a shared hygiene facility. In order to help others, a list has been compiled of the top 10 offenses to shower etiquette seen in a shower trailer at Dodge City North.

Types of individuals you’ll see:
1) “Dirty Man”: Takes a shower with his dirty shower shoes and leaves dirt and gravel in the shower. He also uses the shower stalls to wash his filthy rugs and tactical gear (TA-50).

2) “Superman”: Jumps out of the shower without drying off and soaks all the clothes on the bench.

3) “Nude Man”: Walks nude from the shower, 10 feet to the sink, and brushes his teeth in the nude. (Note: These sinks have less than 2 inches between them).

4) “Sneezy”: Sneezes and unclogs his nose all over the sink, shower, etc., aka “Honker”

5) “May I borrow”: Uses your shampoo/soap without asking.

6) “Skivvies Man”: Washes his underwear, etc., in the sink.

7) “Conversation Man”: When there are multiple parties in the shower, and one of them is nude, no conversing should take place!

8) “Tequila sunrise man”: When you are done with your shower, there is no lying around in the nude on the bench. Just leave.

9) “Invisible Man”: Puts his soap and shampoo in the shower to reserve it while he is shaving and brushing his teeth (while others are waiting for a shower).

10) “Curtain Malfunction Man”: Doesn’t know how to tuck the shower curtain inside the shower so that the floor doesn’t get soaked.

If you are guilty of any of these violations, please knock it off. When you get home you can revert to whatever strange rituals you normally carry out during your personal hygiene time.

Lt. Cmdr. Gerry Fernandez
Camp Victory, Iraq (Stars & Stripes: Letters to the Editor)

...girls of the USAF...
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

No comments: